What God Has Joined by Nicky Galliers : A Story Inspired By A Song

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England, 

October 1216

No one tells me. I just know. He’s in trouble. 

This doesn’t happen often, he isn’t a daring individual, not in that sense, but this feels different. Wrong. 

    I order my retinue, have my clothes packed, all my necessaries, comb, cloths, kohl for my eyes. I take a rough horse, built for stamina, not my fine palfrey, for I do not need to impress but to travel quickly.

    A long journey, over a hundred miles. And, for what? A hunch? An idea? A feeling. A sense that this is urgent. 

    Three hard days on the road through a landscape rich with the regal reds and golds of autumn, England wearing its colours as if displaying itself at a tournament. We stop only to change horses, calling on favours and issuing demands, to travel to Newark. 

    He’s there; he is now. And I know because I can see the castle by the river. I recognise it. I see what he sees, feel what he feels. Newark. My guards are too familiar with me to question me. 

No man gainsays me. No man owns me. My second husband has been dead these six months, killed in a tourney, the ass. I have heard the stories, met the man who is the Marshal, a man who would never succumb in such a pointless manner. 

    Still, it gives me the freedom to go to his side at Newark, to the man who holds my heart. To my first husband. My lord and my king.

They try to stop me entering his chamber but I glare imperiously, a look learned from my great aunt, Matilda. It comes naturally to me, I have been told all my life. They stand aside and I push through the door into the stifling gloom beyond. 

    Almost indiscernible in the dimness is the curtained bed and within, John. 

    ‘How is it you are here?’ he asks, the lines on his face deepening. 

    ‘I had to come. I couldn’t leave you, not now.’

    ‘So, I am dying.’ His acceptance is agonising.

    ‘We are all dying.’

    ‘But you came.’

    Of course I came. ‘I miss you.’

    He lifts his hand and brushes my cheek. It is a soft touch, his fingers tantalising. He has done this before, but before the sensation was more intense. He is too weak for that now. 

    ‘We never stood a chance.’ His voice is low but I hear him. I shuffle closer to him across the covers.
    ‘You had to be king.’
    ‘Kingship confers all earthly delights, wealth, power, lust. But not love. Love is not allowed.’

    ‘We found it between us. We lost each other but not the love.’

    He smiles and shakes his head. ‘There was never a place for us, never a time. Denied by man’s laws, not God’s.’

    ‘You made your displeasure clear. ‘

    He laughs, a rough sound but not strong. ‘Not that it did any good.’

    ‘It did. It kept them all away and gave us moments.’

    ‘Not enough, not nearly enough.’ He falls back on the pillows, sweat beading on his forehead and the creases resemble a screwed up piece of parchment, and as pale. 

    ‘What can I do?’ I ask, leaning to him. 

    He snatches at breaths until the pallor recedes and the lines are smoothed. ‘Nothing, my love, nothing. You are here. What more is there?’

Little.

He is so thin. Never heavy, more gracile and elegant than his hideous brothers, he now would sway in the wind. 

    I can’t see beneath the thick woollen blankets and the beaver fur cover, but I realise he is broken, snapped. Too brittle to face all his troubles, he finally splintered. Had I been with him could I have protected him? No, I think not. Not master of his fate, he is certainly the architect. 

    ‘Will you stay?’

    ‘Naturally.’ The corners of my lips twitch. ‘I am between husbands.’

    He grins. Then he sobers. ‘So you are mine again, my first Isabella. Without sharing you with anyone.’

    ‘I was always yours. And I always will be.’

    ‘Forever?’

    ‘Forever.’

    He curls and twists with pain and I am helpless. We don’t have forever. As young as he is, I don’t wish forever on John. He has had enough. He has lost everything. Except me. Our forever will last until nightfall, no longer.

    I hold his hand and he clasps me as hard as he can but he flutters like a trapped bird in my fingers. No sounds creep in through the gaps around the door. The room is silent but for the rasping of his breath. Everything is still but for the rise and fall of the covers. With each breath his chest lifts a little less and my pain heightens until the blankets remain flat and my heart breaks. I kiss his still warm lips and taste my own salty tears.  I draw back and watch as his handsome face cools; his tousled hair appears more golden against his pale skin. I pull my legs up and lay next to him, my head on his chest, the only heartbeat my own. The tears still fall.

I am the only person who will miss him, whose world is now collapsing. They all wish him gone, except me. 

    There never was forever; it is a lie. And if there were a forever, it is purgatory, for I am alone. 

And yet, forever is all I have left, stretching away, empty and dead.

© Nicky Galliers

Historical note: John and Isabella were married at Marlborough Castle in Wiltshire, on 29 August 1189, shortly after John acceded to the throne in 1199, before the end of August, he obtained an annulment.

Did you guess the song title?

Who Wants To Live Forever? Queen

(Official You Tube Video)

Nicky Galliers
is Discovering Diamonds'
 technical editor
and a prospective author

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The Full List of Authors

December

2^nd   M.J. Logue   First Love 

3^rd   Richard Tearle Chips and Ice Cream

4^th    Helen Hollick Promises, Promises

5^th    Paul Marriner Memories

6^th    Pam Webber One Door Closing

7^th    Louise Adam Hurt Me Once

8^th    Barbara Gaskell Denvil Sticks and Stones

9^th    Judith Arnopp Secrets

10^th  Erica Lainé  Silk Stockings

11^th   Anna Belfrage Hold Me, Love Me, Leave Me? 

12^th  Annie Whitehead Frozen

13^th  Tony Riches Alas, My Love

14^th  Clare Flynn, Zipless

15^th  J.G. Harlond The Last Assignment

16^th  Elizabeth St John Under The Clock

17^th  Alison Morton Honoria’s Battle

18^th  Jean Gill The Hunter

19^th  Patricia Bracewell Daddy's Gift

20^th Debbie Young It Doesn't Feel Like Christmas

21^st   Ruth Downie  Doing It Properly

22^nd Nicky Galliers What God Has Joined

23^rd  Elizabeth Chadwick The Cloak

24^th / 25^th CHRISTMAS BREAK

26^th  Helen Hollick Ever After

27^th   Barbara Gaskell Denvil Just The One... Or Maybe Two

28^th   Deborah Swift Just Another Day

29^th   Amy Maroney What The Plague Brings

30^th   Cryssa Bazos River Mud

31^st  HAPPY NEW YEAR

 Note: There is copyright legislation for song lyrics 

but no copyright in names, titles or ideas

StorySong graphic by @Avalongraphics 

additional images via Pixabay accreditation not required